Local Area Asian Student Tired of Stereotypes

New York- Alan Chung, a Sophmore Political Science/Biology double major at New York University, has spent the last 5 years of his life battling stereotypes, and he's tired of it.

"I hate how people judge you based off of the color of your skin. It's suffocating, and it makes me feel like I can't be the person I really am," Chung said. "Just because you're Chinese doesn't mean that you're going to be good at basketball."

Ever since Yao Ming's much ballyhooed entrance into the NBA, the 6'7 Chung has been having to deal with his dorm and classmates attempts to force him to get on the court and "ball". Continually praised for his 35 inch vertical, "mad ill" handle with the "rock", and silky smoothe jumper, Chung's friends spend hours a day coaxing him go to the gym, telling him that he'll have his "shit worked out" for his post graduate years if he just picks up a basketball.

"That motherfucka' needs to get out to Rucker Park and tear shit up," Arpan Suvagiya, Chung's Genetics lab partner, proclaimed. "He's always reading books. I have no idea where that came from. That shit can't give him what ballin' can. You know, academics and shit? Everyday, me and my boys is like, 'A-Money, becoming a doctor is stupid as hell. You think your Asian ass gonna be a doctor? Yeah right!' Last time I saw an Asian doctor was that Korean chick on Grey's Anatomy. Chung's bitch-ass don't listen to shit. Just want to study! Wastin' his goddamn life and gettin' his ass deep in BioChem."

Chung is tired of hearing it, and he is ready to take a stand. He has already joined the Science League and Aviation team at NYU which both hold weekly meetings every Tuesday and Thursday night, respectively, at exactly the same times as his intramural basketball team, The Ill Nanas, hold practice.

"I figured if I showed them how important academic success was to me by getting involved in something like Science League, they'd understand I'm not like the rest of the Asian kids who just play basketball. That I'm different. That I like to study and use my mind, you know?"

Unfortunately for Chung, his friends refuse to let him leave the team that he has committed to behind.

"Science League? That shit for real?" Varun Sinha, a 6th year English major, exclaimed upon hearing the news of Chung's defection from the team. "Gonna have to crack some nerd skulls, and get A-Money's ass back on the team. Science League? Like beakers and shit? Man, once an Ill Nana, always an Ill Nana. Better recognize that shit. We run deep like blood, son. Ain't no leavin'."

Chung however was not intimidated stating that, "Varun is always threatening to make hits on people when they try to get involved in something other than basketball. He rarely follows through. His parents would get angry as hell, and withdraw his tuition if he ever got caught. Besides, he already has a record for touching himself in public and shoplifting. Third strike and he's out."

Like Martin Luther King Jr. and Rosa Parks before him, Chung is ready to take a stand of non-violence to end judgments based purely off of the color of one's skin, and to free all Asians of the restrictive stereotype that have spent years battling, no matter the sacrifice.

"I know that some day the public will look upon the Asian community and see more than a jump shot or tomahawk dunk," Chung said. "That we as a people are not defined by the color of our Nike Airs or the size of our over sized icey white t-shirts. On that day, they will finally see that we are an intelligent people, a hard working people, that have dreams outside of the confines of the basketball court. One day that dream will be realized... when I overcharge their asses for a routine checkup. Word is bond."